It has been a funny week. Funny peculiar - not funny ha-ha. I've been more upset this week than any other since Dad died (7 weeks ago now). I don't know why that should be. My mum and sister seem to have been the same, so maybe we're all just starting to feel the reality of what has happened kicking in.
It takes me ages to get to sleep at night. As soon as I get into bed my mind starts playing a movie. It's the Late Night Horror Show. It starts with Dad in hospital - and knowing deep down that something was badly wrong, but waiting for the sickening reality to be confirmed. Then it fast forwards to the last weeks at home. The awfulness of watching somebody die. Vivid, unpleasant images of a ravaged body sustained only by a strong will and a family's love.
In the early days after Dad's death my mind played over and over again a Romantic Film... the grief and the sadness was softened by love and the peacefulness of the ending. And by the relief of seeing suffering end. I preferred the Romance to the Horror, although I knew inside it wasn't real.
I think I just have to ride this out. I am still in control. Just about.
Coping strategies:
- A self ban on visiting Macmillan and Cancer websites. The stories I see are just too heartbreaking.
- Getting back to a normal life and routine - i.e. finding a job.
- Finding another focus in my personal life - getting fit again is a good one.
- Oh and taking a holiday! Not to run away from things, but to relax mind and body before Autumn kicks in and a new life chapter unfurls.
Saturday 18 August 2007
Sunday 5 August 2007
Wonderful Waterfall Walk
Waterfalls Walk - Ingleton.http://www.ingletonwaterfallswalk.co.uk/index.htm
Today I started training for a walk I plan to do up Mount Snowden in Wales (highest mountain in England and Wales) next year. In fact, I may attempt three peaks in England, Scotland and Wales. Still putting my plans together - it'll be a fund-raising effort for Pancreatic Cancer research.
We headed over to Ingleton in the beautiful Yorkshire Dales to do the Waterfalls Walk. It is the first time we've done this walk in about 10 years. It's a beautiful walk and the day was perfect - warm and sunny and clear. We figured that if it got very hot in the afternoon, we'd be nice and cool on the shady footpath round the rivers.
So, we paid our £4 each for the privilege of walking the trail (including parking) and started walking at 11.20am. The trail is rocky and uneven, apart from when it hits really the steep sections and there they've put in massive steps. By that I mean steps that sap your energy as you climb up them - they're pretty high. After a while, each set of stairs got tougher and tougher. My heart was pounding hard and felt at times as if it were about to leap out of my chest. God I'm unfit. This was a real wake up call!
We stopped several times to admire the view. Well really, it was so that I could get my breath back. Half way round we stopped for a sandwich. Then onwards for the final push home. We'd fooled ourselves that the second section of the walk was going to be all down hill - in fact it wasn't. It was both up and down hill in equal measure - absolute murder on the knees!! The picture below is looking toward Ingleborough hill - one of the three highest peaks in the Yorkshire Dales. The other two are Whernside and Pen-y-Ghent. We've climbed the first two - but not Pen-y-Ghent. They are on the list for the training plan!
Well, the point of today's blog was to insert my photographs, but Blogger is failing me... so I'll have to put them in tomorrow. Ah - they seem to be uploading now. However, these photographs alone can't convey the power and energy of the water... the noise was incredible at some of the falls. I hope you can see the tea coloured water falling over the rocks... it looks really unusual. But first, another view from the long open section of the trail - this section cuts across a couple of farms and takes you from the first river - the River Twiss - to the second one, River Doe.
There's also a picture here of a fallen tree with coins embedded into bark... there are several of these around the walk. I remember taking my nephew Joe, about 12 years ago when he was only 6 years old. Of course, he was the only child trying to take the coins OUT rather than put them in, LOL!
Some of the falls on the second half of the walk (you move on from one river to another one) are more beautiful than on the first section. Although it's hard to call as they're all nice, in my opinion.It took us 3 hours (including stops) to complete the 4 and a half mile walk. After the walk was finished (and it was really hot by then) we had a quick coffee and then set off back home, calling in at Skipton on the way. There was a Farmers' Market at the Canal Basin... unfortunately the Farmers were all packing up to go home by the time we arrived (about 3pm).
So we wandered into the High Street (via an ice cream shop) and then back down the canal. From Skipton all the way to the A1 at Harrogate we were stuck behind the same red coach. It was driving me crackers! But finally we arrived home, tired, but feeling that we'd achieved something today.
So we wandered into the High Street (via an ice cream shop) and then back down the canal. From Skipton all the way to the A1 at Harrogate we were stuck behind the same red coach. It was driving me crackers! But finally we arrived home, tired, but feeling that we'd achieved something today.
Friday 3 August 2007
Golf Day
After July's pitiful postings, I will attempt to blog more in August. I am sure that news has delighted any readers :-)
The first Friday in every August is "Golf Day". This is an annual tradition and the Golf Day in question is held in memory of Roy's brother Robert, who was killed in a road accident at the very young age of 22 on July 25th 1994. I never met Robert - I met Roy in 1995 when he was still very much grieving his brother and coming to terms with what happened.
So, Golf Day involves a tournament in the morning at Temple Newsam Golf Club, and then the players retire to local pubs for as long as they can stay standing. I never, ever go anywhere near the event... for me, it's a "lads" thing (the only girls who go are Roy's nieces who were very close to Robert as they're a similar age) and I like Roy to have this day out to himself. The closest I've ever got to it was the year I went to pick Roy up and I sat outside the pub beeping my horn because there was no way I was going in there to greet him and his drunken pals!
Usually I am working on the first Friday in August - obviously not this year. Renee, my future sister in law (she's engaged to Roy's brother Gary) was off work on holiday and suggested that we have a girly day out in York. Sounded like a good idea to me.
The weather was lovely - bit cloudy at times but warm and largely sunny. We caught a train into York and arrived about 1-ish. Had a good mooch around the shops stopping only for coffee and cake (well there was a European market on in town and it would have been rude not to contribute to the French economy).
After shopping, we wandered down to the Kings Arms on the riverside. We managed to grab a seat outside and stayed for hours, having a few beers and chatting. I felt like I was on holiday, it was so warm and this pub has a great atmosphere... a mix of locals and tourists. The pub is famed for being York's most flooded pub... they have markers on the walls to show how high the river has come up.
We'd decided to eat at Loch Fyne, a seafood restaurant, as they were doing a good offer (2 courses plus glass of wine for £11). It was quite a way out of the centre of York and we walked there at about 6-ish. We were surprised when we were offered a table at 9.30pm! We declined and walked back towards the main shopping area. There's a quaint olde worlde part of York called the Shambles and it's full of little pubs and bistros, so we headed over that way. Found a nice little place called Kennedy's and settled on their rooftop garden for our dinner.
http://www.kennedyscafebar.co.uk/index.php
So, after 2 courses and a bottle of wine (a bargain at £28 in total) we wandered round to the Station and caught the train home. I was impressed by the amount of walking I'd done today - and even more impressed that my feet were not killing me! Maybe the wine and beer had numbed any pain.
When we arrived back in CrossGates, Renee phoned Gary to see where they were... he said they were at the Devon pub about a 15 minute walk from the station. We walked up there to meet them (so I broke my promise of never going near Golf Day) and then Roy and I walked home. It took us ages, because one of us (me) was walking in a straight line and the other (Roy) was decidedly drunk and zig zagging along the pavement!
The first Friday in every August is "Golf Day". This is an annual tradition and the Golf Day in question is held in memory of Roy's brother Robert, who was killed in a road accident at the very young age of 22 on July 25th 1994. I never met Robert - I met Roy in 1995 when he was still very much grieving his brother and coming to terms with what happened.
So, Golf Day involves a tournament in the morning at Temple Newsam Golf Club, and then the players retire to local pubs for as long as they can stay standing. I never, ever go anywhere near the event... for me, it's a "lads" thing (the only girls who go are Roy's nieces who were very close to Robert as they're a similar age) and I like Roy to have this day out to himself. The closest I've ever got to it was the year I went to pick Roy up and I sat outside the pub beeping my horn because there was no way I was going in there to greet him and his drunken pals!
Usually I am working on the first Friday in August - obviously not this year. Renee, my future sister in law (she's engaged to Roy's brother Gary) was off work on holiday and suggested that we have a girly day out in York. Sounded like a good idea to me.
The weather was lovely - bit cloudy at times but warm and largely sunny. We caught a train into York and arrived about 1-ish. Had a good mooch around the shops stopping only for coffee and cake (well there was a European market on in town and it would have been rude not to contribute to the French economy).
After shopping, we wandered down to the Kings Arms on the riverside. We managed to grab a seat outside and stayed for hours, having a few beers and chatting. I felt like I was on holiday, it was so warm and this pub has a great atmosphere... a mix of locals and tourists. The pub is famed for being York's most flooded pub... they have markers on the walls to show how high the river has come up.
We'd decided to eat at Loch Fyne, a seafood restaurant, as they were doing a good offer (2 courses plus glass of wine for £11). It was quite a way out of the centre of York and we walked there at about 6-ish. We were surprised when we were offered a table at 9.30pm! We declined and walked back towards the main shopping area. There's a quaint olde worlde part of York called the Shambles and it's full of little pubs and bistros, so we headed over that way. Found a nice little place called Kennedy's and settled on their rooftop garden for our dinner.
http://www.kennedyscafebar.co.uk/index.php
So, after 2 courses and a bottle of wine (a bargain at £28 in total) we wandered round to the Station and caught the train home. I was impressed by the amount of walking I'd done today - and even more impressed that my feet were not killing me! Maybe the wine and beer had numbed any pain.
When we arrived back in CrossGates, Renee phoned Gary to see where they were... he said they were at the Devon pub about a 15 minute walk from the station. We walked up there to meet them (so I broke my promise of never going near Golf Day) and then Roy and I walked home. It took us ages, because one of us (me) was walking in a straight line and the other (Roy) was decidedly drunk and zig zagging along the pavement!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)