Back "Home"

It feels good to be back and Mum and Dads. I feel more settled here because I have stuff to do and it keeps me occupied. I also feel somehow calmer about the whole situation when I am around Dad. I also found out that Mum hadn't coped too well at the weekend and got over-tired with it all.

Dad had changed in the week since I'd seen him - in that he is thinner, his face looks smaller. His eyes aren't quite as bright, and he just isn't as sharp as a week ago. He gets a tiny bit muddled over some things now. Other than that, he was on good form, chatting away, wanting his ear, eyebrow and nasal hair trimming. I seem to have acquired the job of barber as well as nutritionalist. Lorraine does manicures, pedicures and poo.

I arrived just before the Doctor's first visit for the week. She had a chat to dad about his various symptoms and their management - currently, these are:
- Dry mouth and lips (solved by gel based saliva substitute and vaseline)
- Bruised, red and splitting skin (possibly to be solved by lowering the clexane dose)
- The pressure sores (this is just part of the daily routine now - re-dress and pack, oramorph for any discomfort caused)
- Vomiting on rising (and occasionally at other times)
- Thrush in mouth (solved by Nystatin and if that doesn't work, Fluconazole)
- Pain in shoulder blades (we think this is pressure when lying a certain way)
- Sensitive and itchy skin (I now wash Dad's arms every afternoon and put Sudocrem on to relieve this, and we've stopped using scented shower gel/soap).
- Occasional Deafness (solved by putting warm olive oil in Dad's left ear a few times each day)
I think that these were the main talking points today.

As Dr Rathbone was leaving I gave her a copy of the Final Gifts book that we'd told her about. Dad wanted to know what it was, and I said it was the book that mum had told him about - one which was reassuring about death - how it happens etc. Dad promised Dr Rathbone that once he'd had chance to properly check heaven out, he'd come back down and tell her what it was like. I think he likes to send her on his way with a giggle.....

A lot of the carers comment on how pleasant it is to come to look after Dad... they think he's lovely, and he is of course. We hear them chatting and laughing in his room with him - sometimes it's like there is a party going on in there!

Later today, I was talking to Dad about his shoulder pain and he was struggling to find the words "Shoulder blade".... so he said "that bit where my wings will go when I go up to heaven". He is still making me laugh, too. I also noted that he is still doing his musical coughing, where he'll end each cough with a little "tune". Oh, and he is still obsessed with his bowel movements.
We're almost at the stage where he's got the nurse and carers weighing his output. :-)

And finally, Dad is still keen to know that he looks ok - mainly because he's been inviting visitors again. He says he wants to see "the lads", Stella and Ann in the next two weeks, before he starts "looking awful". He doesn't think it's nice for people to visit a cancer patient once they're all gaunt.

Warning - black humour content in the final sentence of today's blog.

It's June. Which means that I am not the winner of the "When will Dad Die" Sweepstakes. My prediction had been May. So maybe Lorraine has got it right - she had July in her mind.

This isn't at all because I wanted Dad to die in May, it's just the sort of timeframe I had in mind seeing how he was on leaving hospital.