Catheters, Cleaning and Cuts

I was up at 5.30am with Dad, but not for long. He just needed his Buccastem tablet (anti-emetic) and I think that was all. Then he had mum up a few times, and by 8.30am we were all awake and up.

I got up because Dad was convinced that he had a bladder problem. He was saying that his catheter wasn't working and despite our reassurances, he was convinced there was a problem. I think he got concerned at the lack of output in the catheter bag, and wouldn't have it that he'd barely drunk anything yesterday which was more likely to be the cause.

So, I changed the catheter tube and bag, so that I could show dad the urine was coming through. I warned him that it could take an hour or so to start. He sat drinking water and studying the tube intently. After an hour (and while the carers were with him) he called me in to ask me to contact the doctor. I checked the tube - nothing there. Hmmm... strange as Dad said everything felt ok, and last time there was a backing up (due to a kink in the catheter tube), we knew because there was leakage. I called the District Nurse (doctors don't do catheters!) and Denise said she would ask Gail to bring a flushing kit to flush out Dad's bladder.

I put the phone down and next thing I heard cheering from Dad's room. I wandered in to see what was going on, to find the Care assistant triumphantly holding up Dad's catheter tube - full of wee! Ah, it's working again.... thank goodness! Dad seemed happy for me to cancel the flush out. The carer said that sometimes they get a little airlock and that she hadn't done anything to get things moving, it had just started.

After the carers had been I got Dad's toothbrush and stuff for him. He took ages cleaning his teeth and was so weak and slow. I don't now if he was taking so long because he wanted to do a good job, or because he just didn't know how long he'd been going. Whichever, it upset me to see him so weak again and I had a good whinge in the bathroom while I was cleaning his toothbrush, cup and bowl out.

So after the morning's excitement I spent a little while cleaning mum's flat, which doesn't take too long. Then I headed to Lorraine's for a haircut - I hadn't had it trimmed since January!

Dad had been smiling to himself when I went into his room earlier on. I asked him to share the joke and he said he was laughing about women. Why, I asked. Oh, the way women are always worrying about their hair, he said, laughing again. Ah well, that's something you and Roy won't ever have to worry about, I said... you're just jealous. He laughed again. Good to see a smile on his face.

When Gail (District Nurse) came, she already knew to expect Dad to be weak. She also knew his Zomorph dose had changed. Dr K had briefed her. After she'd gone, Dad was questioning what she had done, and asked me exactly what happened to him during her visit. When he told him, he was surprised... "didn't feel a thing" he said. "I quite look forward to Gail coming now". This is a massive turnaround - he used to groan when Gail was the Nurse on duty. Now I think she is so quick, he likes her to call.

Dad was due to have vistors tonight - Joan and Wally - but when I asked him about it at lunchtime, he said to ask if they could leave it until Sunday morning. He said he was fresher in the morning (he'd been sleeping pretty much from after the carer's leaving today). Mum and I had dithered over whether to cancel them, but as soon as I asked Dad, the decision became very clear. I had dreaded the day we had to do things like this, because it feels like another milestone - telling people not to come because Dad is too weak and sick. Not good.

And then I headed home. I anguished a little about this, due to Dad's condition. But then I decided that if I could have a quiet weekend, and rest up, then I'll be ready for the week ahead of us - and we have no idea what this will bring.

I don't know whether mum has realised that things may be drawing to a conclusion. I think I need to start gently preparing her that this final stage may not last very long. But then, what do I know! All my guesses and predictions so far have been off the mark.

When I phoned mum tonight she said Dad had asked her not to let the carers in when they arrived for the evening visit - he couldn't be bothered with them. This was half an hour after they'd been and gone.